It’s a Bumpy Road

I’m not sure why I thought for a minute that this journey would be smooth. I know that the closer you walk with the Lord the more bumps in the road of life you will experience. After every testing comes a blessing. God is always faithful and if I am faithful in the testing, God will bless me.

Pass the Test

I know that in my head but sometimes my soul forgets that this journey is all about my faith. I can only grow to the level of pain I can tolerate. When I first became a christian I remember hearing people say “God will never give you more than you can handle.” I am learning that is not true, he gives us more so we can learn to trust him more. If we can’t bear the pain then we can’t bear the success. So as I make my way through this grief process I have to remember that this pain will pass and I will be stronger in the end. Even if I can’t see that now, I trust that my heavenly Father knows what is best for me and will bless me with all that I need. If I pass this testing then I know I will receive all that the Lord has promised to me.

“Because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete not lacking anything.” (James 1:3-4)

Attitude makes the difference

It’s my attitude that determines how I perceive and handle the day. When I choose to see it as a gift then any trials that come I know God’s got this. It gives me the strength to keep moving forward. Keeping a good attitude is not as easy as it sounds. There are many days when I feel the pain of Tom’s death as though it was yesterday. I wonder why it still hurts so deeply and when will this new life feel normal? Do I want this to feel normal? Does that mean I have to forget about my former life? Keeping a good attitude is so rough.

Don’t Give Up

Even though I am in the middle of an unpleasant bump in the road, it’s important I don’t lose faith. I stay focused on the present and not flounder in the past. That’s not saying I forget Tom or that I love him any less, just that I am choosing not to dwell on those memories which may cause deep pain. I need to give myself permission to be happy and feel the peace I believe is God’s plan for my life.

If I can fight the should of’s, could of’s, and what if’s then I believe peace will follow. Most of the time I know that being there would not have made any difference. But I know I’m not alone when those types of feelings surface. So when they surface seeking God’s grace to squash them and banish them from my mind, sets me back on the right path.

‘My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,’ says the LORD. ‘And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.‘ Isaiah 55:8-9 (NLT)

Dear God, help me to believe that I am doing what you called me to do. I trust that You’ve called me to this season for a reason. Give me the focus to stay on the right path. Thank you for the grace to manage each new day and the courage to take one more step.

Close:

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